jueves, 26 de marzo de 2009

Una noche para bloggear

Hola, son las 3:47 de la mñana del 27 de marzo de 2009, estas lineas a continuacion seguramente pensaran que son escritas desde el mas profundo estado alcoholico que haya estado, pero sinseramente, la mayoria de la gente que acceda a este blog me habra visto en peores condiciones.

Fiesta del Ingresante 2009.

Es la 4ta vez que asisto a una fiesta de este estilo, siempre apoyando al espiritu de mi facultad (o sea hacerme pasar por un fan politico para conseguir alcohol gratis...) desde un vamos hay millones de cosas que se me ocurrieron escribir camino a casa, espero poder retratar las mas importantes o por lo menos las mas significativas. Para empezar, quiero explicar porque escribo en este estado, yo creo que el alcohol en mi produce una especie de inmunidad a decir las cosas que no debo(o por lo menos a cosas que la gente tomaria a mal si las digo) pero es un inhibidor, para dejar de ser la persona falsa que soy, el ser que trata de caer bien a todo el mundo aunque probablemente no lo logre pero que tiene una careta que le permite vivir "en paz" con el mundo que lo rodea, ese ser repugnante que tanto odia cuando se manifiesta en las personas cercanas a él, pero que sin embargo no puede dejar de emplearla para vivir lo mas feliz que le es permitido. Esa persona que volviendo de un bar de mala muerte tirando su pelo hacia atras pensando que es el que se come el mundo pero sigue siendo el mismo iluso que no logra avanzar en su vida, el mismo que empezo hace 3 años la misma carrera con las mismas metas y se da cuenta que no solo es falso consigo mismo sino que no para de defraudar a la gente que por lo menos a simple vista lo quiere, el que se da cuenta que una persona puede decir las mas oscura de sus intimidades con solo tocar el punto debil de esta y se aprovecha de eso, él que trata de ver la parte de buena de la personas y que se decepciona al primer error y que no se da cuenta de sus propias acciones.

Millones de cosas mas rondaron en mi cabeza esa noche, sobre mucha gente o no tan gente, pero creo que mas importante, es la autocritica que tengo hacia mi mismo, para darme cuenta de mis errores, de corregirlos o simplemente aceptarme y putiarme, decirme lo que esta mal, dejar de seguir haciendo lo mismo que hago yo con la gente que seguramente vale la pena peliar por ella. Esto seguramente es un grito de ayuda inconciente o no tan conciente como para tener el valor de pedirla.

Con mucho mas que decir, pero seguramente no valdria la pena leer...
Me despido

David E. Roth

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lo malo es, a mi criterio, que necesites alcohol para expresarlo y lo más importante: que no te plantees seriamente empezar cuanto antes.
hace mucho que venís con estas cuestiones, por ahí precisás un empujón, que no soy quién para darte (y no me saltes acá con que no te presento amigas para que te den empujoncitos).
decía... que así te vas a sentir mejor y vas a encontrar cosas NUEVAS de las que quejarte, porque siempre es entretenido quejarse, porque es aburrido quejarse siempre de lo mismo, y porque vos amás quejarte y no serías David si no lo hicieras.
no tengo ganas de poner mayúsculas al comienzo de cada oración.
decía... ¿no estaría mucho más copado quejarte de las cosas que no podés modificar porque no dependen de vos? y tener la tranquilidad exultante (ésa que tenés cuando sabés cómo programar algo que los demás todavía no entendimos) que las que podés volar de tu existencia, ya las volaste!, las mandaste a la mierda, que te deshiciste de todo lo falso, de lo que no vale la pena, de las sonrisas por compromiso, y de que podés ser quien tenés ganas de ser sin pensar en cómo te van a ver los pelotudos de los demás.
no quiero sonar a libro de autoayuda, quizá meta algunas puteadas en este comentario así corto el ambiente de filosofía barata :P

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Hola david:

Hay muchas formas de decirte cosas, equivocadas o no, pero lo cierto es que uno habla desde su experiencia hacia tu situacion, y las palabras casi siempre sobran, por que tu misma situacion te condiciona generalmente a solo leerlas.Tambien puede darse que, las entiendas y compartas, sin embargo, seguis haciendo lo mismo.Mis palabras y tus razonamientos terminan en el tacho si no sirven. Te digo esto por que estas hace mucho con el tema (segun mai), y eso me hace pensar que es un tema recurrente.Okey todos los problemas emocionales son recurrentes. Para mi la clave esta en abordar el problema desde diferentes perspectivas, que pueden no ser solo razonamientos diferentes, sino mirando las otras facetas del ser humano. Por que el razonamiento te juega en contra.El actuar es una conjuncion de sentir y pensar, si entre las dos se llevan mal, se genera esa inconsistencia.Son tus socios, si los enfrentas seguro que se te ponen en contra, aunque seas el que tiene "la palabra"(literal y simbolicamente).

Conclusion: Si recurriste a alcohol para que salga esta claro: La mente te juega en contra, no le des tanta bola, tu otro socio esta purgando por tener participacion.Si se logra, vas a tener una mejor concepcion de tu problema y es asi como encontrar las formas.

Y si tu mente no es el problema (yo nunca podria saberlo), capaz que tus miedos te limitan.Hace poco escribi un cuento sobre los miedos, si queres leelo esta en mi blog.

Bueno como veras tire un par de posibilidades que me parece que podrian ser, pero bueno si queres hablar seguro va a ser mas productivo.

saludos tocayo!

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